By Brigid Delaney
Publication Date: 2025-12-12 14:00:00
A few summers ago I attended two funerals in one week.
One was for a man who was an atheist and had a lot of worldly success. The second was for a woman who was Catholic, raised three children and lived a much quieter life.
The first funeral celebrated the man’s achievements, but the focus of the service was a deep sadness. No one would see him again – this farewell was final.
In contrast, the second funeral, a church service, was more impersonal. The woman’s name was barely mentioned and her achievements were belittled by the priest in a sentence or two. This woman’s individuality dissolved into something more universal, even neutral, during the Catholic Mass.
But despite this depersonalization of the deceased, the second funeral was much more reassuring. By reciting the words and rituals used at Catholic funerals around the world, the liturgy promised that God would comfort us in our grief, and the resurrection meant that this farewell would be short-lived.
And although…
